First of all, congrats! No matter what the circumstances are, a baby is still a miracle and a blessing. You probably feel a mixed range of emotions right now and that’s completely normal. These steps will hopefully relieve some stress and help you make the right decision.
First things first, you can’t go back in time and undo a pregnancy. So, instead of looking back, look forward. After you come to terms with your pregnancy, it’s time to weigh your options and consult others. While it’s a good idea to consult a close friend or family member, you absolutely shouldn’t feel like you need to make the news public. Your private matters can stay private, regardless of what you see friends oversharing on social media.
Confide in a Friend
An unplanned pregnancy isn’t something that you want to handle on your own. As with most things, sharing your situation with another is better than keeping it all in your head. You’ll obviously want to share the news with your spouse or significant other. However, an uninvolved party such as a close friend or family member can provide you with additional support and resources.
If you don’t feel comfortable confiding in a friend, a support group, therapist, or doctor can provide the same benefits. It’s always helpful to talk it out and get an outside perspective.
And, Remember That You’re Not Alone
About half of the pregnancies in the U.S. are unplanned. It happens to the best of us, regardless of taking the right precautions. Recognizing this may give you some comfort.
If this is your first pregnancy, since it was unplanned, you probably don’t have a whole lot of information about the matter. Before making any decisions, do some research about pregnancy, newborns, and parenting. There are so many great resources out there.
Start on Google, but consider also consulting a first-hand source i.e. your mom. You might be surprised by how much insight she can offer. If you know a couple who went through an unplanned pregnancy, they will probably be a wealth of knowledge.
Take time to learn about all your options. Adoption can be the right choice for many women. There’s no reason to make an uninformed decision out of fear. Experiencing that fear of uncertainty doesn’t make you a bad person. It’s a normal reaction that most women go through, even those who wanted to get pregnant.
Trust Your Instinct, Then Seek Support
Your gut instinct is there for a reason – it’s trying to tell you something! Others can provide guidance, but it’s ultimately you who has to make the final decision. If your spouse isn’t supportive of whatever that decision is, then find someone who is and keep them nearby during your pregnancy.
Our pregnancy resources are a great place to start your research. Remember that you’ll never be alone on this journey.